Today's Hot Nerd: Olivia Freakin' Munn

My appreciation of brunettes goes deep (no pun intended), and my appreciation of nerdy chicks runs equally deep. However, the deepest appreciation of beauty has to lie with those chicks who are A) nerdy, B) brunette C) of decidedly indeterminate ethnicity, and D) just lil' on the trashy side.

Never has someone playing an Atari on shag carpet looked so damned slobber-worthy.

So, to my surprise (because I am so insulated from popular culture), there is the channel called G4...it's apparently for the Gen Y and Baby-Boomlet set. I'd never heard of it. Likewise, I'd never heard of this program called "Attack of the Show" What the hell was I thinking...Because, all this time, I was missing out on Olivia Munn (henceforth known as "Apocalypse Fuck Fantasy 2", only behind my top nerd hotty, Scarlett Johansson, and now edging out the old runner-up, Zoey Deschanel).

I don't know why women hate to sweat...I think I can speak for most men when I say, we love it.

Good ole' Olivia (Lisa) Munn is straight Okie, and --like all intelligent people of limited means-- went to the State liberal arts university (OU), where she had an interesting mix of major/minors, majoring in Journalism and double-minoring in Japanese and Theatre. After school, she headed west, went into television (as well as print moldeing) and began doing what she does best...selling sex to nerds.

 Sing along, now..."Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner..."

Ms. Munn, much to my delight, is the product of miscegenation [Chinese/Caucasian (looks like Welsh)] which, as we all know, only makes the world a more beautiful place, particularly women. You think I'm kidding? I'm not. Scientific, empirical-fucking-truth: Women are growing more and more beautiful because of evolution and greater variance in the gene pool*
I'm not sure what your parents did, Olivia, but they should definitely do it again.

When Olivia Munn got her call on G4, she was asked to do something which she was not quite comfortable with...video game reviews. However, to her credit, she boned up (hee hee) on the subject matter and apparently is now a knowledgeable fan boi favorite. Currently, she hosts attack of the show, where she is now displaying her tech-savvy with all things viral. But, it is her shrewdness (and cynicism) that makes her brilliant. In her own words (regarding showing an occasional nipple, upskirt, etc...) "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, ratings galore!" Witty.

Yes, she will do anything for ratings. And, yes, those are her panties.

Finally, it goes without saying, that Olivia is not just a tech-geek, she also smokin' freakin' hot. Maxim currently has her listed as the #99 hottie, and she hosts "Maxim's Hotties Next Door" segments on G4. This, of course, brings up two obvious points. The first is that I double-dog dare you to find 99 chicks that are hotter than her, much less this interesting. The second is that I know for a fact that I never had a neighbor (next door or otherwise) that looked like this...

When Olivia rocks the Princess Leia, we all win.

*Hear that Midwest? Two important points to take away: 1) It's ok to marry/breed outside of Scandinavia and 2) Evolution does exist, despite what Kansas told you.


No comments:

Post a Comment