Spaß mit Hitler

Yea, Hitler parodies have gotten out of hand, but, there are some actually amusing ones out there...if you look hard enough. So, for everyone not in Germany, where even this satire is probably proscribed, enjoy a few chuckles at the expense of dumb Americans and one of the ultimate bad guys in history

Freestylin' on the Munich Mic.

Yes, there are too many; and, yes, Downfall (Der Untergang) actually has more than one scene.

And, by far, the best one...Hitler finds out dumb Americans are calling each other Nazis...


A perfectly safe-for-work fetish...

This is an absolutely, SFW fetish, therefore is one that has to be shared...hot Russian-looking women, spitting. I know for an absolute fact that I've never seen anything like this on the internet before. Thanks Stumblers!

Obviously, it's all in the innuendo, which may be why it's so damned cool.
Pic via Spitting Girls.

One more, shall we?


WW II in 10 minutes or less...

...as seen through the prism of Facebook.  Saw this over at Kyle's excellent digs, Dawg Sports.  Yep, it's big, so you gotta' click it, but well worth your time...

Never has global calamity been so callously presented...

Saturday has a weird feeling...

While my odd sense of today is not as strange as Green Jello, this band is, and remains, one of the weirdest bands ever. Enjoy the unique rendition of "Three Little Pigs".



Slow. Fucking. Clap.

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John Stewart, take your bow...

Shittiest wizard ever...


Besides this guy....

In Saudi Arabia, a prominent Lebanese television celebrity, who specializes in "love lines" and other crappy advice, is being given the axe (quite literally) for...of all things...fucking sorcery...Per CNN

In a statement released Thursday, the international rights group condemned the verdict and demanded the immediate release of Ali Hussain Sibat, former host of a popular call-in show that aired on Sheherazade, a Beirut based satellite TV channel.
According to his lawyer, Sibat, who is 48 and has five children, would predict the future on his show and give out advice to his audience.
The attorney, May El Khansa, who is in Lebanon, tells CNN her client was arrested by Saudi Arabia's religious police (known as the Mutawa'een) and charged with sorcery while visiting the country in May 2008. Sibat was in Saudi Arabia to perform the Islamic religious pilgrimage known as Umra.

Leave Fridays open for beheadings....

All of this obviously brings up some very obvious questions:

  • Why, in fuck's sake, do we still consider this morally bankrupt kleptocracy an "ally"
  • Why, in the 21st Century, are we hairless apes still mutilating and murdering people over phantom boogeymen?
  • Why, if this guy was truly a diviner of the fates, didn't he see this coming? Doesn't that sort of abnegate the entire concept of a seer?

But, really, to answer one, is to answer all...Saudis, bad fucking people.


Friday apologizes for the funk...

Must have been the weather this week, as we've vacillated between late-Winter, to full-on Spring, and back to Winter today...Combined with the dreadful DST switch, it's been hell-week.

What a god forsaken weather/time adjustment week...I've been slogging through this all week.



Thursday has smack on the brain...

So, just had an interesting conversation regarding the history of opium vs. aspirin...And, as I suspected, people have been getting fucked up longer (since 4000 BCE) than they have been treating simple pain (3000 BCE). Let's hear it for the indomitable desire of people to get pissed.

Relatedly, the excellent Velvet Underground and Nico with their classic "Heroin".



Not going to lie...I'm going to go eat, drink and try to get laid...

This is what I hope is on tonight's menu. And, no, you can't blame me :)
Happy St. Paddy's Day. If you get arrested, call me.


In the spirit of the Northern Troubles...

What the hell...I know it's not solely religious (or even laregly religious so much as religion was just one more tool of oppression and colonialism), but this is damned funny.
H/T Monkeygirl.


Wednesday wishes you a hangover free Thursday...

Happy St. Patrick's Day...Enjoy the Dubliner's performing "Whiskey in the Jar" live at the Vicar Street in Dublin.

For the Gaelic-impaired, Lyrics:
As I was a goin' over the far famed Kerry mountains
I met with captain Farrell and his money he was counting
I first produced my pistol and I then produced my rapier
Saying "Stand and deliver" for he were a bold deceiver

Mush-a ring dum-a do dum-a da
Wack fall the daddy-o, wack fall the daddy-o
There's whiskey in the jar

I counted out his money and it made a pretty penny
I put it in me pocket and I took it home to Jenny
She sighed and she swore that she never would deceive me
But the devil take the women for they never can be easy


I went up to my chamber, all for to take a slumber
I dreamt of gold and jewels and for sure 't was no wonder
But Jenny blew me charges and she filled them up with water
Then sent for captain Farrell to be ready for the slaughter


't was early in the morning, just before I rose to travel
Up comes a band of footmen and likewise captain Farrell
I first produced me pistol for she stole away me rapier
I couldn't shoot the water, so a prisoner I was taken


Now there's some take delight in the carriages a rolling
and others take delight in the hurling and the bowling
but I take delight in the juice of the barley
and courting pretty fair maids in the morning bright and early


If anyone can aid me 't is my brother in the army
If I can find his station in Cork or in Killarney
And if he'll go with me, we'll go rovin' through Killkenny
And I'm sure he'll treat me better than my own a-sporting Jenny



Haterade time....

If this doesn't give you a chubby then you don't appreciate fantastic defense, power running and full-on team effort by all 85 guys...


Today's Hot Nerd...Glass still dead sexy

You are welcome...


As if a heart attack weren't merely bad enough...

 I wish I were talking about the "nurses" at the Heart Attack Grill...

In what could be this year's least stunning bit of scientific research, clinicians in Germany have found a link between corornary heart disease/heart attacks/strokes and impotence....

The University of Saarland report, published in the journal Circulation, suggests men with impotence should be checked for cardiovascular disease.
Some experts want doctors to ask about impotence in over-40s health checks.
Impotence is linked to inadequate blood flow in the penile arteries.
These are much smaller than coronary arteries.
So for some men, a persistent failure to get an erection might be an early sign that his arteries are narrowing.

 What do you mean, I can't get it up?

This really shouldn't surprise any...whatsover. The male penis is a feat of hydraulic engineering that requires adequate blood flow. No blood flow, no happy time. So, I guess we now get to amend the  heart attack symptoms and signs:
  • Tingling/Pain in the left side of the body
  • Left side facial pain
  • Crushing/tightness in the center of the chest
  • Fleshing/sweating...

and this...

Tuesday's sleep is just screwed...

I detest the shifts between daylight savings and standard time: it screws my sleep to no end. In times like this, Queensryche comes in handy for the sheer beauty, timbre and tone of these extroardinary musicians...if it weren't for their awesomeness, then it would be soporofic

Like Aerosmith, these guys have one of the best live shows, evah!



This week's Internet win...

This is the best bra ever made, even if bespeaks to a certain lack of A) class, B) tact, or C) giving one fuck about the opinions of others...


Shadowy Bookshelf: Looming Tower

Today's book du jour, is a powerful one...and a controversial one. The Looming Tower by Lawrence Wright.

Is it REALLY about these 19 yokels?


This is not just your run-of-the-mill, Al Qaeda-are-bad, book. This takes a sweeping look at the 20th century foundations of the jihadist movement, beginning with the strict Bedouin Wahabbi philosophy, and then through the overarching tales of Egyptian scholar Qutb, John O'Neill, Iman Zawahiri, Dick Clarke and Osama Bin Laden, tries to make sense of the greater pan-Muslim movement. To call Lawrence's work ambitious in its breadth is a vast understatement.

Not really...it's more about this guy, and the historical axes in which we're currently operating.

NYT's Review, shall we:

The Looming Tower may be the most riveting, informative, and "heart-stopping account" yet of the men who shaped 9/11 (New York Times Book Review). The focus on individuals gives the book its emotional punch, but it is also a narrative bold in conception and historical sweep. Lawrence Wright conducted more than 500 interviews, from bin Laden's best friend in college to Richard A. Clarke, Saudi royalty, Afghan mujahideen, and reporters for Al Jazeera. The result, while evenhanded in its analysis of the complex motives, ideals, and power plays that led to 9/11, leaves few nefarious details uncovered. An abrupt ending did little to sway critics that Looming Tower is nothing less than "indispensable" reading (Cleveland Plain Dealer). 

A Random Amazon Reader thinks:

 It is Wright's objective to get inside, to the very core, of Al-Qaeda's chief figures and show us how they feel humiliated by the successes of the West, including Israel, and how this humiliation, plus a great deal of sexual repression, animates their obsession with becoming "martyrs for Allah." Lawrence Wright achieves his objective masterfully and leaves a terrifying, indelible imprint on the reader. Having read dozens of "9/11" books, I can say this is my favorite. The book succeeds for several reasons. First, it shows the failure of American imagination in dealing with terrorism. Second, Wright's narratives leading to 9/11 are effortlessly woven with concrete (never academic) psychological profiles of the seeds of Al-Qaeda: We see the fastidious, sexually repressed Egyptian anti-Semite religious scholar Sayyid Qutb as he navigates post World War II America. He is disgusted by our freedom and equality for women and his disgust radicalizes him so that he returns to Egypt to support a radical theocracy movement that thrives to this day. We see Bin Laden's number two man, Al-Zawahiri, one of Qutb's acolytes, a complex intellectual who consolidates all his brilliance and energies to become a cold-blooded killer. We see of course Bin Laden himself and the historical roots of his hatred for the West.

A complex, nuanced intelligent book, The Looming Tower does not demonize Islam. To the contrary, it shows that mainstream Islam has struggled against extremists spawned by the post World War II writings of militant Islam jihadist founder Sayyid Qutb.

What is most amazing about this book is that Wright's ability to get inside the head of a terrorist with the narrative speed of thriller novel allows us to comprehend the terrorist's motivations and to wake up from a deep sleep that has imperiled us.

Some Beg to Differ:

This book is overwritten. The actual content could be in an essay. There are pointless diversions, etc., etc.,and when it gets to actual facts it jumps around. It really needs an editor who knows the subject. 

In reality, most of the critics spout some incredibly difficult to rationalize stuff...like this guy...only less sane.

Der Schatten thinks:

This book is ambitious, beautifully written, and -above all- human. If you want strict coffee table fare, this likely isn't for you, but if you want a psychic autopsy of the ideas, beliefs and humanity of the players, then definitely give it a try: the upbringing of the Bin Laden children, O'Neill's Shakespearean comi-tragic life, Richard Clarke's world-weary outsider, Zawahiri's denunciation of the medical/scholastic dynasty he stood to inherit, the ethereal Osama (far different from a mastermind), and above all the grim real politick of disgruntled, ill-educated, and underemployed young men in a part of the world that most of us refused to acknowledge before the late '90s.  There is a reason this won the Pulitzer Prize. Engaging, painful, funny, and above all, one helluva ride, despite the (oft-noted) abrupt ending.

The Verdict?

 Four out of Five Spider Monkeys.



Monday has THIS stuck in its head...

Sha Na Na actually had a helluva' lot of talent. And, complete neuronal firings made me think of them this morning, so now, enjoy some faux 50's doo-wop.

"Remember Then".