It would be so worth it...

Guaranteed to keep the Jehovahs away from your little bundle of blackness....

Sometimes, I think breeding would be so worth it, just so I could bedeck my youngster in a way that I was never able to before --don't wory though, the original devil spawn came around eventually >:)

This lil' number from Drac in a Box will be the hit at the next Montessori Finger-Painting Party...

However, for sheer coolness, nothing (and I mean NOTHING) beats the gift of creativity. And, as we all know, children's creativity is fostered initially through scribbles and coloring. Well, why not get them started on the (Left Hand) path with things they need to know: Like Absinthe, and Fishnets, and Ravens.

 Hell, I'm thinking about buying this kick-ass book from BabyGoth.com
Click to go John Holmes size...

Do you have that TARDIS in a size 42R?

God, I love the British.

Paging Buffy? Van Helsing? The Frog Brothers?

Der Schatten does not believe that being the worst actors of a generation in anyway qualifies one as a vampire..."undead", certainly, because they are brain-dead zombies, but not vampires.

I was going to rant, and rave, but I realized that I don't need to. You all know that Twilight sucks. Ham-fisted, overacted, leaden prose, wooden dialogue, Mormon proselytizing, etc etc.

These two could totally take out the entire "Twilight" milieu

I tried to read that horrendos horsehit on three separate occasions. I wanted to know, to understand, just what everyone thought was so cool. Well, that's what I get for actually listening to people...Everytime I tried to read that nonsense, I threw said book across the room, screaming a torrent of invectives and/or profanities, usually along the lines of....

You tell 'em David... 

And most nauseatingly, this whole "and the lion feel in love with the lamb" horseshit. Know what that's from? Huh, fuckers? Here's a clue...READ ISAIAH 11:6....MORMON VAMPIRES!!!!

You stake 'em, I'll take their caffiene-free Clamato Juice.

Anyway, New Moon comes out tonight, and I am horrified, simply horrified that I have to (again) hide from 12 year old girls. More appallingly, I have to listen to the ravings and fan boi shit from those grown-damned-women who absolutely know better but are lacking in taste and/or literacy.

Dear Buffy, can you please come out of retirement ? I've unearthed a clan of really easy to find, douchy bloodsuckers in Oregon who are totally after kids...K Thx Bai.

Friday is homesick....

Maybe one day, I'll get closer and closer to home.

Lyrics, Go Now:

Tennessee, baton rouge
Dallas, texas
Coming through
New orleans, I could stay
But tomorrow I’m on my way

I’m close to home (close to home)
I’m close to home (close to home)
I’m getting closer and closer to home
I’m close to home (close to home)
I’m close to home (close to home)
I’m getting closer and closer to home

I been here
I been there
I been nowhere


I Bring You Fire...

Mock me, I dare you...EXTERMINATE!!!

Need a good cry?

C'mon, you need it.

Then the Experience Project is your place. Sometimes it seems as though we soldier on through life, bereft of others who are going through the exact same thing, or are in the exact same place as us. This website is damned refreshing. For instance:

Ever feel the need to cry just to prove that you can feel? Here's your group.

Can't take the stress anymore? Try this one

Perhaps you are in a committed, but sexless, relationship. They feel your pain.

Seriously, when life is too much, remember, you are not alone. Ever. There are others out there, other folks sutured up like psychic footballs, the walking wounded, the would-be Icarus who just never even made it off the ground.

Hell, it beats the alternative...

Suicide = Lame....And a waste of ass.

Something for the broke bibliophile

If you're like me, then your appetite for books is outpaced only by your inability to locate/afford them. what if you could swap meet for these titles? Say, give away a book, and then receive one that you actually wanted? Imagine NetFlix for the literatti.

 It might not help you get into MENSA, but chicks dig literacy.

Wish no more, it exists at BookMooch.com, and, it's free. Here's how it works according to the owners:

  • Give & receive: Every time you give someone a book, you earn a point and can get any book you want from anyone else at BookMooch. Once you've read a book, you can keep it forever or put it back into BookMooch for someone else, as you wish.

  • No cost: there is no cost to join or use this web site: your only cost is mailing your books to others.

  • Points for entering books: you receive a tenth-of-a-point for every book you type into our system, and one point each time you give a book away. In order to keep receiving books, you need to give away at least one book for every two you receive.

  • Help charities: you can also give your points to charities we work with, such as children's hospitals (so a sick kid can get a free book delivered to their bed), Library fund, African literacy, or to us to thank us for running this web site.

  • I thoroughly plan on availing myself of this service, and will let you know how it works.

    Thursday's heading out the Back Door

    It does not get more traditionally goth-y than this, Clan of Xymox's "Back Door". Harkening back to a darker, grimmer existence. Enjoy.

    Lyrics, go now:
    I am shrouded in darkness
    I crouched in wasted years
    I lingered, I can't get through
    Dazzled between far and near
    Like the elegies relate to days beyond recall
    I lingered in many memories

    And again I stumbled through the back door
    Seeing you, a misty shadow
    I feel my repression
    I can't go on
    And again I am falling backwards
    Tomorrow I will be here again
    A silent mute of a black desire
    Tomorrow I will be here again
    Tomorrow I'll be here again
    Be here again
    Be here again

    I am tired of tears and laughter
    Or what may come hereafter
    I am weary of days and hours
    Desires, dreams and powers
    Although it makes me weep
    It is you
    I wanna keep
    I wanna keep 


    Your Mark Ingram Heisman Meme Alert

    "Every football player, I’m sure, has dreams of winning the Heisman Trophy. But you can’t let it affect you performance. You’ve got to help your team win games. That’s what it’s all about"

    FULL ON FIRE, evident in Rivals most recent piece:

    1. RB Mark Ingram, Alabama: Ingram has rushed for at least 140 yards in five of his past six games (he had 99 against Tennessee in the other). In that span, he has gained 950 yards. He has faced five defenses that rank at least 25th in the nation and rushed for 811 yards against those teams. He played sparingly against Florida International and North Texas, games in which he easily could have padded his stats.


    1. Mark Ingram, Alabama: I've had Ingram as my No. 1 Heisman guy for at least a month, and he has continued to shine while carrying Alabama's offense. I really like that he's done most of his damage in Bama's toughest games. He ran for 150 yards against Virginia Tech, 140 yards at Kentucky in a game in which the Tide struggled, 172 yards at Ole Miss when he was the Tide's only offense, 246 yards against South Carolina and 144 yards against LSU. With two high-profile games remaining (Auburn and Florida), I think it's his Heisman to lose because he has been so consistently outstanding.

    Sports Illustrated

    1. Mark Ingram, Alabama, RB, Soph.

    Last week: 19 rushes, 149 yards, 2 TDs; 1 reception, 9 yards in a 31-3 victory at Mississippi State
    Season: 194 rushes, 1,297 yards, 10 TDs; 25 receptions, 225 yards, 3 TDs

    And, more interestingly, there is Finally an official Mark Ingram for Heisman website, called End the Drought.

    Pay them a visit, and pay Mark your respects.

    Finally, a group of Flint, MI rappers has even devoted a ditty to Mark called "Ingy". Pretty cool.

    Dance with a winner.

    It looks like this might really happen people. Roll Tide!

    Scientologists: Forced abortionists....

    Gotta' listen to V on this one, kids. 

    Recall a few weeks ago when I detailed the story of Florida Scientologists who were kidnapping and torturing members who wished to leave their little cult? Well, that's pretty light treatment according to Australian Senator Xenophon, who's been documenting the latest parade of horribles by these thugs Down Under. Including:

    - Paul Schofield admitted to being part of a campaign to cover up the facts surrounding the death of his two daughters, including two and a half-year-old Kirsty, who died during a purification programme.
    - Aaron Saxton confined and tortured a follower and coerced females to have abortions, one who used a coat hanger for fear of punishment. He also has details of murder confessions from members in the US, information that was never passed on to police.
    - Carmel Underwood was put under "extreme pressure" to have an abortion, and witnessed a young sexually abused girl being coached on how to keep it secret.
    - Anna and Dean Detheridge, who were forced to reject a gay relative, provided evidence that personal information was used to blackmail and control them.
    - Kevin Mackey revealed how he handed over nearly a million dollars in exchange for services and products after he was conditioned by the sect.
    - Peta O'Brien was discouraged from seeking treatment for cancer, was cut off from her son and provided evidence of being assaulted.

    What a laundry list: A) coerced abortions, B) concealed sexual assaults, C) child molestation, D) assault, E) bribery, F) blackmail, G) murder, H) kidnapping and I) torture. Sounds great. Sign me up. The Mafia is the only other tax-exempt organization I know with those aims.

    Hey, listen up...we don't force abortions on anyone. That's just slander.

    But surely, you say, these aer just a few bad apples? Nope. Don't forget this "church" is still proscribed in Germany for these very reasons, and France just fined the church 450,000 Euros for exorting money from a dying woman.  It is a criminal enterprise and a cult, not a religion at all. All in all, L. Ron Hubbard would be pretty proud, the program is working according to plan

    Right out of the jackass's mouth...

    Sublime does not do this justice...

    I can't think of enough adjectives or superlatives to describe this short film by Bruce Branit. It is the story of a man, who loves his ailing partner so much, that he builds an entire world for her. The visuals are stunning, the music thoughtful, and -in all honesty, I don't remember seeing anything that moved me quite like this, for a very very long time. This is a masterpiece of the human condition.

    Wednesday's Got voodoo stuck in its head....

    Now you do too!
    Here come the drums, here come the drums.


    White trash and Cash for Gold (as seen on TV!)

    Really, did you expect anything more?

    I spent a lot of my formative years chillin' in North Alabama, very close to the murderous hillbillies in Tennessee. We had an exceptionally low opinion of them -not only for their lack of dentition, but their overall White-Trashedness. This little gem is not out of the ordinary:

    WAYNESBORO, Tenn. -- Twenty-two-year-old Tim Holt of Waynesboro, Tenn., was arrested after being accused of crawling through a dog door to jewelry from a neighbor, officials said in a Florence, Ala., TimesDaily report.

    Waynesboro Police Chief Keith Reeves said Holt is accused of breaking into a residence on Wayne County 99. "We got information that he had bragged to some people about how it broke into the house when the woman was gone," Reeves told the TimesDaily.
    The jewelry was sold to Cash for Gold and a portion of it was hidden, the chief said.

    This story is just so much fail, and so tragically redneck. Sneaking through the doggie door? Selling your loot on CASH FOR GOLD for fuck'sake? Well, what would you expect from a state that has adopted a coon dog as its mascot...



    New Awesomeness: Goths In Hot Weather

    This is a wonderful site I ran across, Goths In Hot Weather: A Celebration of the Sunshine Goth. The authors ask "But there's one thing that troubles me about our cheery friends: what to do they do in summer? All that makeup, long black leather and rubber must get very sticky.".*

    Well, yea, they pretty much that.

    Having come from Dixie, where the sun always beats down on you, and it stays hotter than the 9th Circle of Hell, I am here to emphatically answer that question: They do much the same as anyone else...only in less clothing.


    And, well, they pretty much do that too....

    I know that I and all of my friends pretty much did the same thing as everyone else...dips in the pool, trips to the beach, lounging around as the sun set (and, in my case, working on cars, chopping wood for winter, etc). So, it wasn't that different. Yes, during daylight the clothing was -by necessity- minimized, but in the fall or evening, the fashion show resumed.

    Methinks this is in Montana. But, same concept...Glad I could be of help.

    * All images appearing herein are the (c) of GothsinHotWeather.com.

    Tuesday's heading the Mega Therion

    Therion's Birth of Venus Illegitimata: Beautiful. Along the same line as Haggard, Nightwish, etc., but far riffier and catchier...a little less classical.


    Living in the Midwest...Yeah, it'll do it to you...

    via Bore Me.

    Today's Hot Nerd: Russian MILF edition


    I do like the women who earned their sex appeal the hard way: being cunning, ruthless and damned brilliant. Therefore, I present one of the exemplars of that particularly cool subset of women: Ms. Yulia Tymoshenko. 

    NB: Women in America, largely of Western Euro persuasion do not look like this...

    More than just a (very) pretty face, Tymoshenko is -HOLY HELL!- the Prime Minister of the freakin' Ukraine That's right. This seminal 49 hottie is a Head of State for the second largest post-Soviet Russian nation, the one sitting strategically on the oil/gas rich Aral and Black seas, the one with Kiev, and the one with somewhat stable nuclear weapons stockpiles.

    I see your smooch, and raise you a stiffie....

    Prior to entering her politcal career, she was not a model or actress. No, she was much more in keeping with the post-communist spirit: She earned her PhD in economics and then became a shady capitalist snatching up state-run video stores and privatizing them. She later became filthy rich as an oil and gas magnate, a position largely attained through bribery, reselling stolen commodities, and an-out ruthlessness akin to a black widow. However, when she did decide to become politically active, she helped foment the Orange Revolution. A pretty face helps with that I'm sure.  

    Sorry Obama, you ain't got an ass like that.


    perspective people...perspective.

    In the past year, the dread H1N1 virus (a/k/a Swine or Hamthrax) has stirred up the dread of "pandemia". Well, if it's a pandemia, it's a pretty pussy one. The last 300 days have given us a grand total of 5850 H1N1 deaths...globally. That's 100 a week, worldwide.

    Nooooo, swine flu pandemia!!!

    I think at this point we all need to chill out about the swine. For instance, Dengue Fever -another human infectious/communicable disease, has already killed three times as many people. Sound exotic does it? Well exotic only to the extent that:

    Each serotype is sufficiently different that there is no cross-protection and epidemics caused by multiple serotypes (hyperendemicity) can occur. Dengue is transmitted to humans by the Aedes aegypti or more rarely the Aedes albopictus mosquito, which feed during the day.[5] The WHO says some 2.5 billion people, two fifths of the world's population, are now at risk from dengue and estimates that there may be 50 million cases of dengue infection worldwide every year. The disease is now endemic in more than 100 countries

    That's right. 40% of the world is at risk of contracting an imminently fatal disease that offers no cross protection from previous exposure and is already indemic to 100 nations. So, take your NyQuil, drink fluids, don't fucking panic, and realize that this ain't the Spanish flu people. It's wussy version of the plain old flu, and those suckers killed 3,500,000 people last year alone. Of those, only 5800 were swine-related (in other words, regular ole flu got 604 people for every person that died of swine).

    Seriously, would you rather get the swine or stumble upon even chilled-out polar bears?
    I win. 

    Monday thinks it can dance one-handed.

    In honor of the beloved Club Metro/Paradox (back in The Hearta'), enjoy your Monday....

    Dance with Me by True Sons of Liberty: Part punk, part old-school...100% kick ass.

    "Dance with me my dear
    On a floor of bones and skulls"


    Sunday wants a recap of the Plunder and Pillage

    Ill Vision's Plunder and Pillage. enjoy some riffsomeness with your coffee and Sunday Times.

    Starkvegas: Pillaged...and so is my hand :(

    In honor of the 31-3 thrashing of Mississippi State last night, I present you the below funny evolution of the game from 1997-present. Als, it seems as though I've broken my hand, so typing shall be necessarily minimal for the nonce

    I recommend the volume option for the Mussorgsky track playing in the background