Who's got hos? Ludacris got hos.

From the Strange Maps websites...this is a list of the area codes where Ludacris purports to have/or had/or retains 'hos'...I swear to God, I'm going to make one of these

It sucks to see your peeps hurt...

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, it is hard to say goodbye, but sometimes it has to be done; not out of discontent or unhappiness, but singular self-preservation.

Morning Militancy: Come Out Ye' Black & Tans

Come and fight me like a man.

Gasp! A Hockey post?!

Sure, Game 7 was anti-climactic, but I don't know if I could handle another OT game.

I loooooove Hockey. I grew up in the South in the 80s and 90s, where hockey was a damned near unknown quantity. But, I fell in love with Mario Lemieux and the late 80's Pens,and have remained a Pens fan since (even the historically bad teams of 4-6 years ago!). Since that time, I have adored the speed of the game, the athleticism, the toughness, and the sheer aesthetic beauty of the sport. So, imagine my surprise, when I stumbled across this excellent vault article from SI detailing the many, clever ways in which folks have cheated and skirted the rule.

Now, carry on kids, and enjoy the three month war of attrition that is the Stanley Cup playoffs. Let's go Pens.

You know what, this would look nice held up over center ice at the Igloo.

Musing over nothing in particular....

I am exhausted, having worked the better part of every waking day for the past two months. But, despite the crippling debt incurred, the undoubted stress and anxiety, and the perpetual high stakes, not a single waking day has gone by where I regret becoming a lawyer.

Every day in the life of an average lawyer

Call it tilting at windmills, but there are things and people and ideals out there worth fighting for, worth correcting and worth preserving. I've never lost sight of that, and doubt seriously that I ever will.


Carry on.

What's the only thing better than Fridays?

Three chicks playing strip-Twister.

Some people have Mondays or Humpdays...

But I have Thursdays. My entire professional career has always been marked by exhaustion and apathy on Thursdays. This morning is no different.

Not about Mondays, but any excuse to look at and listen to Suzanna Hoff works for me.

Free Hugs...

Wherein I rediscover my faith in humanity, and am left speechless.



What a brighter world, for just one day, one person at a time...

Better sex? Republicans? Democrats?

From Outrage, a movie "outing" gay politicians with anti-gay policies.

I think if anyone is qualified to discuss bedroom antics, it is I. By disclosure, I was in a fraternity, in a heavy metal band, and am a lawyer. I am not unattractive, love to party, and have somewhat sketchy morality concerning what grown people do without their clothes (or wearing one another's). So, to weigh in:

1. GOP girls give it up much much easier than Dem girls. Perhaps it is the misogynistic lives they've led, or the inherent sense of being subordinated by their party and partners, but they just do. The one exception are the super Christian types, but they don't hang out with me anyway.
2. GOP girls tend to enjoy sex more. They just plain romp when they get right down to it.
3. Dem girls tend to give farrrr fewer oral favors than GOP girls. Not sure why, but Dem girls are a little more resistant.
4. GOP girls are hella' surprised when you down on them, Dem girls expect (and often demand) as much.
5. That said, Dem girls will do damned near anything. If kink and variety is your bag, bag a Dem.
6. Dem girls will do it more often. If you're in a dating/sexual relationship, Dem girls will approach you for sex, or want it, far more than their GOP counterparts.
7. GOP girls do tend to be in better shape...again, though, they are expected to lest they lose their trophy mantle. However, Dem girls are far prettier.
8. Dem girls have orgasms easily and more often than their repressed counterparts.
9. Expectations of pre-conubial outings differ as well. Wine bars then sex? Dem girls. Beer and doggie in the back of a pickup? GOP girls.
10. And, the one question that decides it for me, who do you want to wake up with and have a chat over coffee vs who gets cab fare? That's easy...Dem girls. The GOP girls will skitter up and out and make the walk of shame/call a cab, etc...and that assumes that they would have had anything intelligent to say to begin with

some days you just want to mail it in...

I scream, you scream, we all scream...

Pictures really are worth a thousand words, eh?

Today's Hot Nerd: Zooey Deschanel

Her nerdentials have been discussed before, now it's time to simply sit back and observe the splendor of a smokin' nerd cutie dancing in bridal dresses and go-go boots.

This will never get old.

Your Country is Fucked: Ghana

True Story...Africa really looks like this from space. Ironic that it's called the "Gold Coast", no?

Welcome to Ghana, a small sub-Saharan nation surrounded by the pillaging/raping/prostituting neighbors: Ivory Coast and Togo are but two. Ghana was part of the original slave trade to the New World. The Dutch and British especially would come for the strong, cheap labor to import back to New Crackerland across the Atlantic...the idea worked so well that, after virtually every nation had stopped importing slaves, the British just threw their hands up and decided to made Ghana "a protectorate"...thereby enslaving every single man, woman and child under the Imperial yoke.

When a white guy from Europe says "trust me", you're better off running.

Following a century and a half of European rule, the Ghanans broke free from the British (well, sorta'...they more slipped away with the 1950's collapse of the British Empire). Since then, they have been, more or less, a model of stability in an otherwise unstable part of the world. Best part is, Ghana has twice as much income as poorer African nations, meaning its GDP is worth a ball full of navel lint and some kool aid covered pennies (Ethiopia would totally lick those pennies, thank you very much). Still, Ghana has not been without its coups, strongmen and forced reliance upon global subsidization, making the nation not as fucked as others on the Continent, but still very very fucked in Western eyes.

depressing book....

"Columbine" by David Cullen. For the first time, the entire sad spectacle, from a hundred different voices, reconstructs one of the worst, most senseless tragedies in recent American history. It's a damned shame that it took so long for the narrative to turn away from "spooky kids are violent" towards what it really was: a profoundly troubled young man, and incredibly insecure one mismanaging adolescent angst, rage, acceptance and the stress of transitioning from one world to another.

That's right, Media, this guy got it right before you did.

This is a profoundly disturbing look into the heart of reasonably normal kids dealing with the inhuman. While not exactly a perfect analogue, Hannah Arendt's term "banality of evil" comes to mind. Sigh. You know who else had something to say about this?

Someone shot tomorrow.

Fuck My Life...

Awesome website...Trust me, as fucked as my life is, it's not this bad...

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

Today, I received a list of employee names who were losing their jobs and I had to remove them from the system as I work for IT. I was on the list. That's right. My last responsibility as an employee was removing myself from the system for security reasons. FML

Today, I had a presentation to make before 20+ executives from high up in the business chain. I used a power point to aid in my presentation. About halfway through the power point, my screensaver turned on. It was an animated picture of boobs rubbing against a soapy car windshield. FML

Today, I got pulled over heading home from college. My car was full of my stuff from moving out and I couldn't reach the glove box. I told the cop this, and asked if he wanted me to go around to the passenger side to get my paperwork. He agreed. When I got out of the car he pepper sprayed me. FML

Today is the five year anniversery of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML

Ahem...lest we need reminding...

For my friends on the Plains (2004 Auburn-Opelika People's Champs!), one word...
Scoreboard.

Oprah Winfrey: High Priestess of American Paganism

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Iowa. Just as I was lauding you, you produce this toolbox.
Yes, I get it...you like Iowa State and KFC, but Oprah? Nope.

Genghis Khan? Rock n' Roll? Leningrad Cowboys.

If you can do better than Finnish mock-rockers, sing-a-long subtitles and rampaging Mongols, then accept the challenge, sir.

Morning Mourning...Is it September yet?

Ladies and Gentlemen, your undefeated, 12-0, University of Alabama Crimson Tide. God, can crisp Saturday afternoons in the beautiful Autumnal South get here already?*

* I do not approve of the Nickelback here...What the fuck were they thinking?