11.10.2010

A Few Thoughts on the Value of Sexy Toys.

McDonalds. Xandria. Burger King. Adam and Eve. McRibs. Fleshlights.

What do these things have in common? If a sex toy shop in Huntsville, Alabama has its way, then they are all things that you will soon be able to shop for via a drive through pick-up window.

As WHNT Channel 19 reports:

Pleasures' proprietor Sherri Williams has found a new way to stimulate business. The new Pleasures location is already open, but starting on Saturday, the former bank building and its three lane drive-thru window will offer customers faster shopping from the privacy of their car, via a four-foot-tall lighted menu featuring a variety of adult toys, lubricants and stimulants.



 No, I didn't order the Enema Kit; just the Medium Ball Gag-to-go. Purple.


The story continues...

Drive-thrus are widely considered one of the greatest convenience revolutions of modern times, and aside from the occasional missing straw or ignored request for 'no pickles', there usually aren't any surprises.

But at the new Pleasures drive-thru, a little spontaneity will be exactly what the customer is looking for. Saturday, the teller bays of an old bank will be transformed in to Pleasures' new one-stop drive-thru romance shop, where customers can pull through, order what they want from a menu and have it delivered right to the teller drawer.


Now, I'm not sure about you, but "spontaneity" when picking out a toy isn't exactly what I had in mind. Latex can cause some serious reactions, for instance. And, not everyone is down with knobbed glass dildos. 

That said, I wholly endorse the concept, especially in puritanical places (e.g., damned near all of America), where people are discouraged from parking their cars and looking for the occasional vibrating cockring, or horse-tail butt plug.



"Ok, so the stainless steel Anubis doesn't really do it for me. 
But, what the hell, if you like it, let's give it a go."
--What everyone should say to their partner's respective kinks


As most of you remember (or could readily guess), I love sex shops, sex toys, and anything that promotes a spirited romp in the sack. Adore them, but for reasons which may surprise you. No, I do not enjoy them merely for the gloryholes. Rather, I think placing odd things in our respective orifices, or eating out of custom-monogrammed pet dishes, makes us a more open, honest society. It makes our relationships more healthy, promotes communication and certainly more fun (although, never underestimate the power of missionary done well).  And, when done right, sexual accessories can be damned beautiful, as well as erotic. (see my previous fascination with shibari).


 Seriously, people, elegant ropework accentuates the feminine form: It's not solely my kink, it's my abiding love of the beautiful. And this is beautiful.


Sometimes, you just want to feel a little dirty. There's nothing wrong with that.  So, go to your local purveyor of porn, and take your loved one along. Talk to one another, discover new things, openly discuss your sex lives and the joys of exploring one another's body.  Laugh, love, live, engage in  commerce to support your local small businesses. 

This sad spin on the carousel of woe is the only life we have. And our bodies are the only vehicle with which to enjoy it. Don't limit that life by artificial and arbitrary constraints, largely imposed by others, who would deny you the pleasure of a healthy, safe, sane sexual relationship.

* * *

For more posts RE: Sex toys, I recommend my confession that I wish I had a vagina to try out the OhMiBod iPod vibrator; the horror that is the Fleshlight; and the Japan collection of lolita, amputee, hentai, sleepy sex WTF -- there are many more, as well, if you're into frightening large dildos and mythical creature dongs :)


-D.S.

4 comments:

  1. You are going to need a doctor's note at the drive-thru though.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I would hope not...getting the OTC versions was awkward enough!

    ReplyDelete