6.07.2010

Shadow Q&A: Part Two

 I told you I was pretty....and butch

Last week, I answered some of the more frequent questions I've received; including where I'm from, what I look like, who my current "end of the world" paramour would be, and my sexual orientation.

This week's Q&A will largely consist of answering the bizarre comments/questions I've received over the past 3+ years this blog has been in existence (and, it's been located four places on the web, sadly).


Who is your role model and/or who were you in a past life.

These are related, and I can answer them with one answer: If I believed in past lives (which I do not, since I am not a flake), I would have been Temujin a/k/a Genghis Khan for the same reasons I model my professional life after him:
  • He was ambitious and absolutely relentless in obtaining his life's goals. Find someone else who was a better task-oriented person, I dare you.
  • He was ruthless, cunning and not, as an individual, particularly cruel...Just single-minded and driven.
  • He never let life kick him in the ass without getting up, dusting himself off, and kicking life right back in the nads
  • He was a consummate organizer and delegator, never micromanaging the affairs of his subordinates
  • He always had an eye for the great purpose and the larger goals, as well as the initial and intermediate steps that were necessary to obtain them.
  • He was surprisingly progressive
  • He loved speed and stringed weapons
  • And, he especially loved the ladies.


Me and the Great Khan...ten toes down; ten toes down.




Why are you a lawyer?

Not by choice, initially. I went to college with the goal of being a heart surgeon. But after getting a C in Inorganic Chemistry, I realized that it would probably be unfair to cut on patients as a C student. Then I went into Pyschology and Philosophy, with a minor in creative writing. While in grad school for Clinical Psych, I realized how very very much I hated people.

The only career options open to philospophers, who love to write, but who hate people are A) taxi drivers, B) unemployment/grad school and C) attorney at law.

I chose C.


 Some of Socrates lesser known maxims include the "Piss off", and "I hate all of you fuckers"...




Do you take yourself seriously?

Not as much as Carrot Top, but moreso than Sarah Palin...


Speaking of Sarah Palin, would you 'tap it'?

I loathe stupid people and do not intentionally sleep with republicans. So, to answer your question, not with a borrowed dick and you pushing...


Sarah ' in 2012: Derp...



Oh, so you're a Democrat?

Only because "militant, yet pragmatic lefitist who despises limousine liberals with the intensity of a thousand suns and respects the rule of law" isn't an option at the voting booth. Besides, libertarians are selfish whiners who never got over being 15 and reading "Atlas Shrugged". I pay my taxes, because I value and like schools and roads and firefighters and courts and parks...however, I really should be able to abort my fetus, while smoking pot, and surfing the web anonymously. Nanny-ism is almost as bad as the police state.

 


 Exhibit A for everything that is wrong with self-serious, doctrinaire liberals.




Damn, I see we're running out of time. Is there anyone particular you want to punch in the face today? And why?


Yes. U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice John G. Roberts. And the reason is Citizens United v. FEC. Go look it up...your democracy is now owned by the oligarchy.



Asshole. 



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