Cats cannot be trusted...

 Meow Mix = human souls.

The headline in the Telegraph (UK) makes it sound like this cat has the amazing predictive ability to know when nursing home patients will die. (Cat predicts 50 deaths in RI nursing home).  According to the article,

The tortoiseshell and white cat spends its days pacing from room to room, rarely spending any time with patients except those with just hours to live.
If kept outside the room of a dying patient, Oscar will scratch on the door trying to get in.
When nurses once placed the cat on the bed of a patient they thought close to death, Oscar "charged out" and went to sit beside someone in another room. The cat's judgement was better than that of the nurses: the second patient died that evening, while the first lived for two more days.

Holy shit, did you read that? This cat will scratch and claw its way to get to a "dying" patient; and has done so 50 times. Then, the person mysteriously, suddenly or imminently (and without fail) shuffles off this mortal coil. You know who else sits outside, and stalks your door, never going away until you've rattled out your last breath?

Yep. Him.


In any event, its pretty damned uncanny, creepy even. According to the story, this kitty was first documented back in a 2007 New England Journal of Medicine article, when it had merely "predicted" 25 deaths. The doctors think that this is some sort of awesome power; that the felonious felines smell ketones from dying cells, especially from the cancer patients. But, I think Occam's Razor has eluded the fine physicians at the elderly home. What's more likely, a cat that sniffs out the dying, or -as the old folk myth correctly predicted- a cat that kills by stealing your breath?

And, that is very clearly what we are dealing with: 15 pounds of tortoise-shelled, Ted Bundy; Ed Gein with a purr.

Not just a hissing, spitting, nuisance and allergy trigger; a likely murderer.


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