3.07.2009

Hot Nerd and Straight Gangsta'

Meet Rachel Yould: She's a Rhodes Scholar, has a PhD from Oxford, was "a former Miss Anchorage, worked with Mother Teresa and was named by Glamour magazine as one of the most notable college students in America."

You mean I can't do that? Here, look at my boobies


She's straight bangin' and straight ballin'...Seems this bright attractive woman decided that she was tired of living the college poverty that we all do (e.g., Pells, Staffords, Perkins, etc.). So, using her guile and obvious intellectual talents, she ripped off the Feds. In an ingenuous scheme, she created a second identity, to get double the student loans. Not being a knucklehead, she didn't piss that money away, rather she invested that ill gotten gain into a Smith Barney Mutual Fund and a private business*. Thus, the white collar Bonnie Parker now faces 10 federal felonies and a lot of time.

Nevertheless, the Shadow salutes your balls, your brains and your body, Ms. Yould!





* I know that her friends try to justify the second identity because of a stalker, and I feel bad for her...But, guess what. She easily could, and should, have A) not applied for loans under one of the identities, or B) returned said money. She's just a criminal guys. A hot one, but a white collar criminal who happens to be cute. I have less sympathy for those assholes taking from the public fisc than I do for someone stealing a loaf of bread for hungry children. If she wants to steal legally, become a banker.

1 comment:

  1. That's definitely not a picture of her.

    ReplyDelete